Tallinnas

Oli Vahva töeliselt vahva, kuigi päev oli vihmane ja mu arvuti hangus Wyatti juures ülesse ja siis
ma olin jälle kärbes seinal, tunnistajaks teise pere suhete draamale. Rääkisin Wyattiga tema suhtest ja tööst jaa maast ja ilmast. Enda omast ka ja eelmisest suhtest.Ja siis me üritasime, mina vähemalt, olla jutuvestja, ja rääkida lugusid et Kristjan ei mängiks PSP ga ainult ega läheks vihma kätte, istusime trepil ja rääkisime jutte ja siis siperkangelaste teema ka. Kui sa oleks super kangelane kes sa siis oleks? Mängeldes. Õnneks jäi vihm järele hiljem Ta on siiski hea isa ja saab oma pojaga hästi läbi, vähemalt praegu ja näiliselt. Vahel me tögame üksteist ja väikselt närvidele käime aga tal pole muidu häda midagi.

LÕpuks tulid nad kõik, Riina ja Kristian ka Nabili juurde. algul vist sellist plaani polnud.
Aga noh vaat mis juhtuda võib, ma vaid oma mahaunustatud dushigeeli ja deodorandi järgi läksin ju, algul pid Wyatt Kristianiga tegelema ja siis ta ütles et vb ta tuleb. Lõpuks tulid teised ka :) Äkki oli mingi plaan ;) et ma unustaksin selleks oma ajad maha, et lõpuks Wilsonid Nabili juurde tuleks ;)
Nad ise muidugi tulid :)

Meil oli tore õhtu Nabili juures. rohkem small talk baasil aga see on ka vahelduseks hea.
Ja siis me läksime Nabili,Dani, Adrienne, Tiina ja Tiiaga Nightteacap'ile Reval Cafe'sse Vanalinnas. Ja me rääkiseme ka Noorteseminari minevikust ja tulevikust ja muid asju ka näiteks mis USA linn keegi oleks.
Mulle sattus Chicago :) pidi olema organiseeritud ehitatult linn, millel on tume pool ja toidukultuur:) midagi sarnast heh veits :)
Ma oleks võinud rohkem yks yhele juttu puhuda, kohati ma tegin seda aga rohkem nagu kommentaarid yldjutule. Teinekord..


ja kui me minema asutasime läbi Vihma, taas :)
ma plätudes ja õhukeses riietuses ja jopes, nagu pärnakas ikka.
Mõtlesin et huvitav mida vastutulijad arvata võivad :D aga ma ei põe see pärast.

ööbisin Nabili juures ja me rääkisime pikalt ja laialt, minu limbostaatusest ja vaadetest enne ja pärast suhtelõppu perioodi.


Järgmine päev hommikustasin Nabiga, ta nõustas mind karjäärivalikul ja soovitas midagi ette võtta kiiremini :),
ja siis veetsin 3 tundi umbes kvaliteetaega oma õe Lindaga, rääkisime veidi Rootsist, bahaidest, religioonidest, perekonnast, sugulastest, tööst ja peresuhetest ja maailmast, filmidest, poliitikast, Vabaduseristist, etc tema atekas Kadriorus :) Mul oli hea meel teda näha :) taas :)

ja siis hakkasin Ma pärnusse Tulema, algul mõtlesin et lähen bussi, ja hiljem sõitsin Rongijaama ja siin tsuhh-tsuhh läbi Eesti Pärnusse. Ja ma nägin vikerkaart :)
kõik muu on eelmises postituses :)

Mis toimub????

On kuningas täna ülal
narrina käib mööda tube
ta veider tunne
arvata seda ei osand
soovist mis sündinud eile
igatsus oootamatu
istub hinges
suu tõrgub, haaramas toru
õige see või väär
ikka vasardab peas
geograafiline vahemaa
eksida ei soovi
toru käib hargile
üles ja alla
dramaatiliselt, valimas numbrit
rääkida sooviks
ujedus sees
kuis mõtled sest
?Kas arm on see?
Tundsin sust puudust
ikkagi ei osanud arvata
igatsust ei osanud oodata
nagu sõltuvus oleks sees
aa, mis toimub, poisike (ja kes siis veel?)

Pärnu 30-31.08.09õ

Come what may...jah võibolla ei ole kyll kõik see nagu ma kujutan ette ja võib olla ei tule sest midagi välja. Viimastel päevadel st eelmise nädala jooksul kaevasin üles Moulin Rouge soundtracki kasseti ja ma olen seda mitu päeva kuulanud.Ja ma leidsin aegunäinud Tallinna perioodil saadud filmiplakati(mille mu eks-korteriomanik ykskord tahtis ära visata, leidsin ta kord paberikorvist ja muidugi ma võtsin ta taas üles ja panin ta seinale tagasi). Nagu ka see kord. Mitte et see identselt minu lugu oleks ja olema saab. Moulin Rouge on pisut Romeo ja Julialik, ja minu eelmine suhe oli ka Romeo ja Julialik. Eri põhjustel ja teise nurga alt aga pisut Romeo ja Julialik siiski. Tulevik??
Ja ma jalutan täna tänaval ja siis tuleb meelde Vse mogut Koroli... ja ma mäletan ennast Moskvas väiksena kuulamas seda raadiost, sellisest kandilisest kastikujulisest,peal lainepikkusedja linnade nimed, lamamas voodis, ma ei mäleta kui vana ma olin, aga see laul ja hetk on mul tänaseni meeles... ne mozhet ni odin, ni odin korol...

Ok , ma ei saa ennast veel kõikide veel laulujuppidega ennast samastada, veel, ja võib olla mitte
aga millegagi lõpuks. igaljuhul on midagi lahti, ma ei tea kuidas seda nimetada, aga kui te oleks mind eile näinud siis rahulikust minast polnud grammigi sel hetkel

Ok, mu arvuti sai niiskust põhjast ka ja nüüd on ta paranduses(imelikul kombel vana IBM kuidagi töötab aga mitte täielikult, ja ma olen vähem internetis, aga siin ma olen, saan raamatukogus arvutit kasutada. Veits väsinud sest sain magada ca 6 tundi, ise ärkasin üles. olin 3ni umbes ylal, ostsisin yhte teatud numbrit, käisin nagu kass ümber palava pudru telefoni juures, valisin ja enne vastuvõttu katkestasin ja hangusin nagu mu arvuti yleeile. Siis Ma sain oma vana arvuti tööle, seadistasin pisut et pääseda internetti, mis mul lühidalt õnnestus. ju mul on siis kommunikatsiooni vajadus hoopis või siis sõltuvus ga tavaliselt olen ma rahulikum. pärast rahunesin pisut vaatasin filmi ja jäin magama. aga kommunikatsiooni vajadus on ikka veel alles ja see tunne ka, tõeline või ajutine eks tulevik näitab? suhelda oleks ka hea :) äkki ma kujutan seda ette, ja on ainult sümpaatia, sümpaatia on kindlalt ja huvi ka..
Kui ma poleks veits väsinud ytleksin et mul on palavik, aga haige ma vist pole.

las tulevik toob arutust
ja i better shape up....:)

YouTube - Born To Be Mild (Born To Be Wild Parody)

YouTube - Born To Be Mild (Born To Be Wild Parody)

Haha, this partially so meeeee :D

Thinking Thin King

I read portion of FIG about change and friendships or relationships to be affected in course of becoming Bahai, this applies other communites and changes as well. Sure its going to be affected, it was then and and it will be. Again. I will keep my frienships even now in these being between times. Id like to ceep both companies like they are now, but i know there will be a dilemma. Beeing treated nicely though so far. and being loved no matter what too :) Like Parent or friend or really realy loving girl accepting you who are and loving the way you are. Almost of course, none of us is really perfect, but i will give my effort. And indeed whatever you do and your friends do is going to affect you. Sometimes good, sometimes not so good and you will not be same. Like the friend of mine who raises gay son and stands by him even if some of her ex-friends dont understand. We dont even most accepting cant fathom the situation, because we are neither in their shoes, we can just be tolerant to idea, of someone choosing different path. As they say in God idea universe only God can really judge people. If there is God of course. Not sure. There is something out there, But as its said if God didnt exist, then we should invent him :).

only thing that this world, human nature is blessed with at least two sides to every story. dilemma is like natural part of us. mind and body.religion adds to it soul of course :)
i know that they are linked, but yet separate. and they are nessesary. gotta find balance. peace of mind or fece of mind :)

have you got the feeling that you dont know what to do, which way to go, confusion, been drawn to several directions. like swan, pike and crawfish :)
well welcome to my world.

i usually live day by day, but keep thinking what if next relationship will be like. dont want to be it the same, riddled by same mistakes.
or sometimes i wonder should i go to into relationships from now on. yet im human being, being alone and spending some quality time with own self is fine. I like it and saviour it. Yet its fun to be people, regardless of gender, to talk to exchange too. we are social beings, and sooner or later crave for companionships in all forms. we want to be noticed, talked to, admired, loved too :) We can say that i write this blog just for own, but deep down its a message in bottle tossed into ocean of existence. Hoping to be found also :)

yet we know, that we are also driven by self interest even if our effort to be altruisious is genuine in our search for partner , love, friendships, or helping others out. we work this way too :) in fact helping others is also selfish too, because if everything and especially your friends influence you, then it is in your own self interest to help others :) so that world around you would not be pain in ass place to live , not just for you, but for your children.

do we know what we really really want? kinda...but there is loong way to go
i know that at times i want to be naughty yet i want at times the rules, and i feel drawn to bahais back.
minus some issues that is. dilemma eternal or at least till end our days :)
i just know that each part of being human want what belongs to it. nature calls for body, and reasoning and philosophical metaphysical drive for mind and soul( those two in idea of religion are connected.) And Mind drives body too. I think that most sexiest part of body is brain, cause it is commanding post for body) Say something wise or you or show me your that you question things, and this attracts my attention.:D
at least even if i dont go physical with person , that person will have respect in my eyes. but i am tolerant too, each person is smart in something. they dont need to be wise my way. And I appreciate also if someone is driven by heart approach. Im fact this is what i liked about Kadri, she is sweet person, caring, never mind the bad sides :) and i will see her way for rest of my existance :)

I want it all and cant help it. its in our nature, to want it all. thankfully there is reason to help to figure it out, yet at same time it makes things really complicated... aaaaagh. but we have to live with it :)

life will go on....nevertheless

Madonna booed in Bucharest for defending Gypsies - omg! news on Yahoo!

Facebook | Khaled Al-Assi: "('It has been brought to my attention ... that there is a lot of discrimination against Romanies and Gypsies in general in Eastern Europe,' she said. 'It made me feel very sad.'
Thousands booed and jeered her.
A few cheered when sh...e added: 'We don't believe in discrimination ... we believe in freedom and equal rights for everyone.' But she got more boos when she mentioned discrimination against homosexuals and others.)
(Madonna's outrage touched a nerve in Romania, but it seems doubtful it will change anything, said the Soros Foundation's Motoc.
'Madonna is a pop star. She is not an expert on interethnic relations,' he said.)

WTF, is wrong with those people. She has to be expert on interethnic relations to say that it makes her very sad to see or hear about discrimination :D ????????? Like she comes from Mars... Madonna can be bold, liberal and provocative, but she is human being and i like she said what she said this time. You go, girl :)

Read more
Madonna booed in Bucharest for defending Gypsies - omg! news on Yahoo!
http://omg.yahoo.com/news/madonna-booed-in-bucharest-for-defending-gypsies/26947Source: omg.yahoo.com

homeward bound

nd feeeling much better :)

Eeyore

Was and still in Eeyore mood a still:

Who is he see: http://www.just-pooh.com/eeyore.html
"Eeyore is a favorite amongst most admirers of Winnie the Pooh characters and he is an unbelievably loveable donkey who is dismally gloomy for almost eternity. But that’s not Eeyore’s perception of himself, according to him; he doesn’t expect too much of himself and therefore remains quiet for most of the time. That in no ways means he isn’t an intelligent animal, he is actually quite knowledgeable yet he confines his knowledge to himself. This is the reason why he is very quiet most of the time and a bit depressed. Eeyore, a very gloomy, blue-gray donkey, is stuffed with sawdust. His appearance is highlighted by a small light pink bow on his tail; this reflects well on this animal when there is an occasional hint of joy that surfaces in Eeyore

Eeyore has very little expectations from his friends and therefore wherever there is an occasion where his friends gather around his to help him, his thoughts of receiving the worst are dismissed and he has a feeling of being grateful to them. Eeyore’s biggest problem is when his tail falls off and that happens frequently (he has lost it many times). And this is where his friends help him the most and amongst all friends Christopher Robin is the one who mostly undertakes the job of fixing Eeyore’s tail. Christopher uses a drawing pin to reattach the tail. Owl once mistook Eeyore’s tail for being a bell-pull. He shall often pretend that he is helping his friends in their time of need because he has nothing better to do but that in no way means he is unwilling to help, Eeyore is always ready to lend a helping hand to his friends."

He is in many ways like me. I dont know , i just want to be sad too. do you get the feeling that nobody really wants to be with you at times, things are not working out, and youre back at reality? where most people care about themselves, nice guys finish last and youre doomed to carry on faulty gene, that gives your children chance to be handicapped in society that worships healthy and perfect ones...
ok not beeen the nicest you know all the time...but you know what i mean...
tadaaaaa

Song list that goes with feelings
Nice guys finish last by Green Day
Boulevard of Broken dreams - Green day
Hey You-Pink Floyd
Well and bit better one
Coldpay- Fix YOU :)

swdedish post

hej Sverige :)
Olen hetkel Undeni järve lahedal, Tivedeni piirkonnas, mille lähim linn on Laxa(Lakso) Örebrost edelas, mis on 275 km Stockholmist metsade keskel.
NÄdal hakkab tais saama,ja eilne vÄhipidu ja synna on ka labi. Homme Uppsala :)
ja siis Stockholm. Ja siis Baltic Queen ja koju :) Tallinn, nats seal ja Koju :)
Wyatti sÕbra Roberti pere on joviaalne, kylalislahke ja vahva. Nalja on saanud. parasjagu koike. Ja eilne synna oli ikka veits sootuks erinevat. Skandinaavalased voivad olla reserveeritud aga laulda ja pidutseda oskavad nad ikka kyll korralikult.
Rootsi on parajalt kirju struktuuriga maa ja Orebro tanavapilt oli veits erinev. kuigi mitte vaga. ainuke erand on eri rahvuste ja riietumisviiside erinevus. moslemi naisi oli naha, somaali omasid. ja ka peol ka mitmeid eri inimesi. Vahva oli.

Pärnust ja Angeelikast; Tallinnasse

Kalevite Kants on kivi viske kaugusel ja ma istun LindaLiini kohvikus ja tõmban hinge. Nagu ikka ma ei maganud piisavalt, ja siis ma kirjutasin blogis ja FB-s. Ja sõitsime Kata ja Anxuga Rongiga Tallinna rataste rappudes. Aitasin Katat. nüüd on naad taas Soomemaale läinud.Hakkan pisikest igatsema ... aga ma näen teda jälle millalgi. loodetavasti pealegi ma sain teda 2 nädalat näha,:)

Is it true mängib raadios jälle, see Islandi eurolaul, mis nii lahkumineku ajaks Eurol ilma tegi.
jah ka see laul on lahkuminekust, saatuse iroonia et see laul ja laulja kaa meeldis mulle väga peale Rändajaid ja Türgi tantsijaid...

aga see selleks...
las rännak algata, täna on uus päev ja ma veedan aega Wyattiga :)

Let the Journey begin

Each journey starts from first step :)

I will embark soon at dawn, go north and then move westwards :)
Soon i will say Hej! well at next Dawn...

A virgin territory :))

A revanche :)

Not going to forget passport or ticket like 1998
before trip to Focusing all Efforts :)

I was walking with Nabil day or two before trip with briefcase inside passport and ticket. and i neede to tie my shoes, so i did, putting bc at the street, tied my laces, sttod up and continued walking and talking Nabil until ...iremembered....
where is my briefcase :)) hehe. its funny now but not then,
i can be so professorlike...out of this world...at times
anyways i found the brief, after rathere quriouus attempt to ask security guy at then Tallinna Bank which became Banco Unione and now SEB to show mw the tape, did i or didnt forget my case at ATM room, i got to know in Pärnu, while other where at conference that someone took it to Viru Hotel :D
but not this time i hope, i will go with Wyatt to vist his freind and see liitle bit
of Svearige :)

Historical theme photos from Pärnu :D

Inimeselugu-Juhan Viiding

Surub nurka inimene ennast,
kas ta üldse enam imestab?
Kas ta mõtleb,
mis on saanud vennast?
Ja et valgus silmi pimestab?
Kuidas saame oma vaatenurgast
näha täiust?
Nürinurga alt? Anna andeks!
Oma hingenurgast ma ei valgustanud piisavalt.
Meil on kiire! Mõelgem selle peale!
Selles ilmas ei saa harjuda!
Teeme terveks oma murtud hääle!
Siis saab vaikselt APPI KARJUDA!

Vaimuelu- Juhan Viiding

Haa- see on tabav luuletus praeguseks.
sellega meenub kui ma ei leidnud õigel ajal kadunud Brigitte Lundblade kasseti pealt Bahai 19.PP vaimse osa jaoks pala mis ta soovis et ma makis mängiks
aga mul oli valmis see luuletus yhe Jüri Lina luulelavastuse kasseti peal.
ja otseselt kurja tahtmata mängisin vist osade hämmastuseks ette. Ei ma ei vaadanud nende nägusid, aga seda nad ei oodanud vist. Juhan Viidingut Bahai pühakirjadele inspireeritud palade asemel :) pärast loeti sõnad peale, igaks juhuks ja Valguskiires ilmusid juhendused.

Vaimuelu

Mismoodi on su vaimu seis?
ei seisa nigu.
kas tõstab pead ta ükskord meis
kui väike tigu?

kas tõuseb ta kui päikene
kui lõpeb öö
ja olles suur või väikene
teeb vaimse töö?

Või läheb mustaks mure läbi
Nii et on tuhat aastat häbi

Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)

"Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives; Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't."

Falling into grace

Bridge over troubled water

For all of my friends of both genders, old and new, i have had and have and will have in my life :)
i hope that i can be there for you, at least i try. Havent been always, but you know
where to find me... ill be around :)



When youre weary, feeling small,
When tears are in your eyes, I will dry them all;
Im on your side. when times get rough
And friends just cant be found,
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.

When youre down and out,
When youre on the street,
When evening falls so hard
I will comfort you.
Ill take your part.
When darkness comes
And pains is all around,
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.

Sail on silvergirl,
Sail on by.
Your time has come to shine.
All your dreams are on their way.
See how they shine.
If you need a friend
Im sailing right behind.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind.

Lastekodulastest-About orphans

Pole ise olnud, aga hinge lähevad sellised lood...

Ja teper ne sirota
I m no longer orphan,

its a story about girl who been left to orphange, gets to know about mom and wants revenge, she grows up being "difficult" child, but loves animals. she makes friends with girl, who later in life helps her to turn her life around, she becomes Christian, and she even forgives mother...






väikesed käed kirjutavad liivale
emake pai tule mulle järele
ma ootan nii väga sind
mis jaoks küll hülgasid mind
kas sa siis oma last
ei armastada saa
armastada ei saa..

mul ei ole oma tuba
enda juurde sa ei luba
kelle oma olen mina
kui mul sind ei ole
kas siis olen kõigi oma
lastekodus elan praegu
kuid ma tean et tuleb aeg mil
ema mind hellitab hoiab ja kallistab
ema koju mind vii..

öö otsa ma mõtlen millal tulla saad
haigeks kas jäid
või ehk teed ei leia sa
kes saab küll aidata mind
kes teab kus viibida võid
kas sa siis oma last
ei armastada saa
armastada ei saa..

mul ei ole oma tuba
enda juurde sa ei luba
kelle oma olen mina
kui mul sind ei ole
kas siis olen kõigi oma
lastekodus elan praegu
kuigi tean et tuleb aeg mil
ema mindhellitab hoiab ja kallistab
ema koju mind vii

miks on see nii
kas te võite ütelda
lapsi ei saa ju lille pähe kinkida
mis jaoks neid emad maha jätavad
mis jaoks need lapsed öösel nutavad
kas sa siis oma last
ei armastada saa
armastada ei saa

white label - köikide laps

Whats the colour of my skin

Race

What is the color of my skin?
if I tell you
will that determine the person I am?
If so then maybe for today
I am pink, red, green, or gray.
I am for the most part the same as you
When I am sad then I am blue.
If I call you my sister or brother,
does that have to reflect a certain color?
Our covering is a gift from the Divine,
so are you mocking this gift of mine?
Instead of judging by what you see
why don't you try looking at the inner me,
if the color of my skin
determines the person I am,
then I am invisible to you
for I am who I am.

-Mea Leann

Angeeelika- isaga draakonil :)

Angeelika has been around for a last week in home and hopital and she is happy little girl, running around and playing hide and seek with her Dad ie me. oh youve just gotta see her.
youd fall in love with her cuteness, smile. way she palys hide and seek, way she manages to stand while walking backWARDS, SOMEtimes even running, like she would have eyes on her back :)
when i was trying to give her piece of sandwitch, she took it ate it and poked with food at her hand, one piece sandwhich . i asked ishe wanting to feed me :D she just pokes food at my food with her little hand and laughs :))
she is dear to me :) She ate more a bit, but still holds food at mouth



Lyrics to Isaga Draakonil by Dagö:


Tahan, et mu prillid pole seks, et peita tühje silmi
vaid et hoopis paremini valgust vaadata
kui mu tütar jälgib mind kui veidrat õppefilmi
hea kui päris kõik ei tuleks välja lõigata

Kauni aia leian kus soovida soove
laia aia ja viinamäe
alla majja saadab mind kuu öö poole
sängi laia uinun ja näen kui`s me sõidame
isaga draakonil
kroonid peast rebib tuul
me ei hooli, me kuningad ikkagi
pungil purjed me draakonil
me eebenist draakonil
täna tuju tal hea, saab veel suhkrut me käest
ja me naerame
kui me lendame
üle lainete
isaga draakonil


On õues igatsust ja on keskpärakondi
võib olla õnnelik või sappi lärmata
pea meeles poeg , kui valid endal ülikondi
nad vahel selga sulle võivad kärvata

IF by R. Kipling

If

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

Loooking for....

Im confused a bit. Thing is what should i do? I kinda started to like life i had previous 2 years, minus bad stuff, bad emotions. Doing what i want, well doing almost what i want, that is. Some of family thought that i was doing too much my ex-s bidding, well i was at somethings. But generally, i was doing what i wanted.
i meaan every day life. I could do always more, learn something new, break routine, sing , write etc
Thing is that now that im out of relationship, i do also what i want. Confusing...ok
HERE is the thing, After Viljandi Folk i have felt that i want to reconnect with my faith people and faith. Me rational guy...well i guess one ist that rational always..
Do i have to be? No...If i want to be religious again, so be it.
of course there are questions, but there is clear wish to reconnect. I guess i have to make up my mind soon. I could out of comfort continue as i am, keeping it inner thing, minding my own business, doing still what i want like last two years or gradually come to spotlight...by returning fully....to the rivers of belief.
with all that entails. that means standing out on b-days etc. but if i want to go that way, and there is wish, there ignoring and stopping it is self-limiting too..

Mind over matter? Why there is such split between heart and mind at the times?
though i like the puzzles and to be human too

Mukhtaran Bibi’s Legacy Continues

Mukhtaran Bibi’s Legacy Continues

Kamikaze Good Circle

We went to have a Night Cap(Nabs Idea) after Asian food and stroll and ended up to go to Kamikaze
I need to try socialize more, i felt im not adequate enough to describe people compared to Dan(really, my literalistic eloquence is ok, but i could do more) or others, its like you think you cam express well, because you write, but then when you go to deliver your piece orally, you may choke or stumble, unless youre good at talking.

Dead meat

Dead meat of derailed train
or how I took train to home :)

wen trough Saku-Rapla-Lelle-Tootsi-Tori then Pärnu
it was scary bit, it was rocking and when it was at higher tempo i was wondering that if somebody threw a bomb, id be dead meat :D and train derailed
but it was different , why take busses all the time?
i liked scenery, and i saw estonia outside my usual trajector
i think its worth of repeat
until a dead meat hahaha

A marriage for a day, where you come from or Khal's Funny day moments

Today
Morning started, when i woke up at Loode house and there it was, odd thing, black top laying across at floor near toilet near my door. It was female clothing. It turned out to be with holes. or so it looked like hehe, i thought myself, i didnt see it last night. i jokingly thought what others may think finding this near my door hehe. Later Helmi told me that they joked that maybe i brought somebody with me hehe. knowing my history hehe..Rita said its sport bra and top?? later it came out it one of their guests cloth, it fell out of somewhere when they arrived that night. mystery solved

I approach lookout platform and watch at old town, sitting first , waiting looooots
of tourists to clear a view. So iget there, i hear some young men aproaching people
asking "Do you want to experience what its to be married for a day?" :D
youll get cerificate, ring etc. hehe
and the later did kissing part and shouted gorko.

2nd
i leave platform head towards Cathedral i meet dark guy standing at corner around finnish embassy. he asks me, where you come from...i said ´from there... ..he said no no...you mean from bacground? yeah he said. and he was gloomy bit, i said i live in Estonia, he said nägemist ...like what....go figure wierd...i thought whatever...
walked on

From album Twelve Shots On The Rocks '03

From album Twelve Shots On The Rocks '03
In the real dark night of the soul
It's always 3 a.m.
It's always darkest before the dawn
It never dawned on me
At my weakest I'm pretending to be strong
Sometimes the demons are too hard to control

(Chorus) In my darkest moment
Something takes me over makes me turn a cold shoulder
In my darkest moment
I need a revalation, divine illumination to come my way
Just when I thought I was me It just wasn't me t-talkin'

And the last one that I never wanna hurt
Stood right in my way
Hating is easy and loving takes real character
Love ain't in fashion in this hard stone cold hearted world

Chorus
(The pain, the grief, the agony...)

Chorus
Let some light come my way...